Montano's Malady by Enrique Vila-Matas

Author:Enrique Vila-Matas [Vila-Matas, Enrique]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi, azw3
ISBN: 9780811225298
Publisher: New Directions
Published: 2007-04-23T05:00:00+00:00

I wish to free myself from Montano’s malady, but hopefully the gods and Kafka won’t let me. I wish to free myself from the malady, and that is why I write obsessively about it. However, I know that, were I to achieve this, I could not comment on my achievement, I could not write about it, because, if I did, this would show—since, directly or indirectly, I would have to name the malady to say that I had forgotten it—that I was still thinking about it in some way. This would obviously be as bad as having the malady itself and would end up giving me the impression that my progress toward death and my progress toward the word were one and the same. I wish to free myself from Montano’s malady, but, should this diary ever reach its final hour and I overcome the illness and my salvation be a possibility, I’m not at all sure that it really will be, I think it will be something I need to comment on. This confirms my suspicion that these pages could go on forever; I don’t know if it is desirable either that they do so or that they come to an end. This is how things stand and, living as much with dread of this diary’s infinite movement as with fear of its death, one calms down on this spring night and even rejoices to see that, although one is writing obsessively about it, one is fortunately still Montano-stricken.

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